(Yes, I'm basing this off of the incredibly funny Monty Python skit, What have the Romans ever done for us.)
What have the Jews ever done for us?!
(Somewhere in Germany, in Nuremberg, in a secret building)
(A bunch of Neo-nazis are talking)
Head Nazi: (stands up to podium) Alright! Order everybody, order!
(Nazis keep talking.)
Head Nazi: (sigh) Heinrich, if you will?
Nazi 1: (nods, pulls out air horn and HONKS it. Nazis all stop talking and their heads snap foreword)
Head Nazi: Thank you! Alright, everybody, welcome to the secret underground meeting of the neo-nazis, its good to have you all here. Now lets get right down to business. The main goal of the neo-nazi party is to rid Germany and Europe and then the world of the Jews.
(Nazis all nod in excitement.)
Head Nazi: After all, what have the Jews ever done for us?!
(Silence and then one Nazi slowly raises hand.)
Nazi 2: The cure for polio?
Head Nazi: What?
Nazi 3: Oh yeah! The polio vaccine was invented by Jonas Salk, a Jew!
Nazi 4: Yeah, my uncle got polio before they found a cure, oy vey!
(Nazis all nod in agreement. Head Nazi tries to calm them.)
Head Nazi: Alright, alright, I'll give you that, but besides the cure for polio, what else have the Jews ever given us?!
(Nazi 3 raises hand.)
Head Nazi: Uh, yes?
Nazi 3: Jeans?
Head Nazi: Wha-?!
Nazi 3: Like the pants, those were invented by Levi Strauss, a Jew of German origin.
(Nazis all nod in agreement)
Head Nazi: Okay, well besides the polio vaccine and Jeans, what
Nazi 4: Oh! Oh! I have one! USB flash drive, invented in Israel!
Head Nazi: Ahhhh
Nazi 3: And what about the shopping cart?
Nazi 2: Or the teddy bear! (yanks out teddy bear and hugs it, all the other nazis scoot away from him.)
Nazi 5: What about instant messaging?
Nazi 4: And the camera!
Nazi 3: Vaccination needle!
Nazi 2: Ballpoint pen!
Nazi 4: Remote control!
Nazi 6: Video tape!
Nazi 4: Who uses a video tape anymore?
Nazi 6: Hey, we had to get to DVDs somehow!
Nazi 3: They also invented sound movies
Nazi 5: And Christianity!
Head Nazi: What?!
Nazi 5: Yeah! Jesus and Mary were both Jews, the Last Supper was Jesus celebrating Passover! Not to mention Paul, who basically spread Christianity, also a born Jew!
(Nazis all nod and voice their agreements)
Head Nazi: ALRIGHT! Besides the cure for polio, blue Jeans, USB flash drive, shopping cart, teddy bear (deep breath) instant messaging, vaccination needles, camera, ballpoint pen, video tape, sound movies, remote control and Christianity, what have the Jews ever done for us?!
(Silence and then Nazi 2 slowly raises hand.)
Nazi 2: Ten Commandments?
Head Nazi: Commandments?! Oh, shut up!
Nazi 1: Maybe we should move on to another topic.
Head Nazi: You're right, ah, lets move on to how much we hate the black people! Lord knows black people haven't given us any
(Nazis are all bouncing basketballs, eating peanut butter, using electric lamps and cranking up the air conditioner.)
Head Nazi: I hate you guys